Are you looking for ways to catch a cheating partner, because you suspect that your partner is cheating? You could just ask them, sometimes, it may just be a silly misunderstanding, but that will probably lead to a lie and alert him or her to your suspicions. This usually ends up in the cheater being more careful and harder to catch.

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If your doubts don’t get erased even after the conversation, then perhaps, the only way to get the real answers is by snooping around and looking for clues when your partner is too busy doing their own thing.

But before you rush headlong into this process, spend a few days thinking about what you are likely to do if or when your worst suspicions are eventually confirmed. Are you so committed to your partner that you would never bring an end to the relationship, whatever the outcome of your sleuthing?

Here are some guaranteed ways to catch a cheating partner without alerting him or her of your actions.

Have you seen a change in your partner’s behavior recently? Have they started working out, dressing better, or started using a new seductive intense evening perfume? They may have no reason for the changes, and almost always, these changes may seem very spontaneous and may be a sign that your partner is cheating on you.

Is your love suddenly purchasing new clothes and spending hours on his or her appearance? If there has been a very quick change in your partner’s grooming habits, you may have a clue to something bigger that may be going on. Looking nice is one thing, but making a sudden effort to look extra special, especially on certain days of the week might be a piece of the puzzle.

  • Pay attention to how he handles the aftermath of a fight.

Does he/she leave, get some space, and then return to apologize? Or does he neglect to apologize or show remorse for hurtful words he said to you? If he is usually good at forgiving and forgetting after a fight and this is not happening anymore, this may be a red flag that he/she is. cheating on you

It’s important to remember that your partner’s inner turmoil has nothing to do with you and is a reflection of his own anxieties and fears. Try not to take his anger towards you personally or put pressure on yourself to try to make him forgive you or feel better, as this could also mean he is actually feeling guilty about an affair.

Related Articles on how to catch a cheating partner

  • Monitor Their Social Media Account

One of your first stops if you suspect your partner is cheating should be your honey’s social media pages. This is a quick and low-cost way to start your search. Facebook is not only good for keeping up with friends and family, but it can also be a tool for checking up on your significant other.

Have you noticed that your guy or gal is constantly commenting on a “friend’s” photos and status updates? You might want to look into that. If the uptick in communication is sudden you might have a problem on your hands.

Create a fake social media profile. You can then use the profile to log on to websites that promote cheating on spouses to see if your partner has a profile on the site or is using one of the sites to arrange hookups

Ways to Catch A Cheating Partner

  • Read Books And Article On Cheating Partner

If you think your spouse is cheating, then you might want to pick up some books and article that will help guide you. In Alba Alvarez book “How To Catch Your Cheating Spouse she starts by telling her own story of being cheated on. She shares what she learned in her life with us. This way you know what to look for in your spouse. She covers the usual things like nervousness, staying late at work, and taking trips. She also gives a lot of other things that could indicate a cheating spouse.

This guide covers everything. It talks about how to uncover evidence of doing wrong. It talks about the best time and way to confront the cheater. About steps to take to make sure you and your kids are safe.

Keep in mind that once he knows you’re suspicious of his behavior, he might work overtime to cover his tracks. If so, you’ll need to be more vigilant and work harder to get evidence of his cheating.

  • Use A Recorder

The app is meant to record sounds that you make in your sleep like snoring and teeth grinding. There may be other night sounds that aren’t exactly made while sleeping, and this app is going to pick those up too. The sounds are outputted to small, convenient audio files perfect for saving. Whatever you say or mean can and will be used against you in the court of your girl.

You can also place a long recording digital tape recorder under your cheating partner car seat every morning and then listen to it when you are alone. Please check the laws in your city or state to make sure it is legal to record someone in your car if they are borrowing it. The same goes for a GPS tracking device which tracks everywhere your husband’s car goes. GPS tracking devices are now made in the size of a pack of chewing gum so they are easy to hide.

  • Drop by unannounced

To be able to catch your cheating partner, you should drop by unannounced to their workplace or come back home early. Don’t make it obvious that you’re just spying on them. Instead, always have a great excuse to walk in unannounced. If your partner is cheating on you, the first thing they’d do instead of welcoming you with a smile is hide something or appear surprised or even angry!

What a cheating partner usually do is to blame their suspicious partners for being unfaithful even when they know the truth. So instead of feeling guilty, try changing your timetable and become unpredictable. Make surprise visits, go home at unanticipated times. Even if they are too smart, you will get them.

Catch A Cheating Partner

  • Snoop on their phone

Does your partner carry their cell phone with them wherever they go, even if it’s a trip to the loo? If that’s happening in your relationship, there’s a good chance your cheating partner is up to something. Take a peek at their cell phone when you get the chance, especially when they’ve put the phone to charge.

Erased phone logs, a password protected phone, several calls to the same unknown numbers, or phone bills without detailed call information are all good signs that your partner is trying to hide something

Look for numbers that are repeatedly called. If you do not recognize the number, call them back from your partner’s phone to see who and how the other party answers. If they answer “hello honey” or “I have missed your lover,” then there might be a problem, he or she is cheating!!

  • Make some assumptions.

If you think you have real cause to suspect your partner, then start with the assumption that she is going to take some kind of precautions to remain undiscovered when cheating.

She’s not going to send emails from the home computer, or call from the home phone. She’s not going to claim to be working late and leave for a hotel rendezvous risking your calls going unanswered or being seen leaving work too early

She will use normal routines and patterns that you are well used to and simply use that time to have the affair. A sexual affair doesn’t require much time or commitment. The two of them meet in the parking lot, hop into one car, head for “their room” at the Motel 9 for a half hour, and are back in time for shopping. She even comes home with purchases consistent with where they were supposed to be. So if you’re truly committed to finding the truth, make some assumptions and take action.

  • Follow after a fight.

A cheating partner intentionally tries to pick fights, slam the door and walk away, because it makes a great excuse to slip out of the house and meet their adulterous lover. If your partner’s been picking fights and walking out of the house often recently, try to follow them on the pretense of apologizing if they see you following them.

He argues with you over trivial matters that he previously ignored. A cheating husband will create fights just to find a reason to leave the house. Little things that he always overlooks became causes for major arguments in the last few weeks. Don’t you think this is unusual?

Changes in his normal behavior that involve anger towards you could, in fact, be a reflection of his guilt for cheating or fear that you may find out about his affair.

Ways to Catch A Cheating Partner

  • Lies

Dr. Lillian Glass, a behavioral analyst, and body language expert who has worked with the FBI on unmasking signals of deception, says when trying to figure out if someone is lying, you first need to understand how the person normally acts. Then you’ll want to pay careful attention to their facial expressions, body language, and speech patterns, she writes in her book “The Body Language of Liars.”

You know when your boyfriend is lying, but only recently has it become an everyday event. Nevertheless, it is upsetting for you to realize this. But why is he lying all the time? The one true thing about a liar, you have to have a good memory, sooner or later the lies will catch you out.

New research by Dr. Leanne ten Brinke, a forensic psychologist at the Haas School of Business at the University of California, Berkeley, and her collaborators suggests that our instincts for judging liars are actually fairly strong — but our conscious minds sometimes fail us.

  • Look through his apartment or his side of the bed for love notes, gifts, and photographs.

If you really want to find out if your partner is cheating, consider where he would hide personal items or things he doesn’t want you to see. Examine any physical evidence of cheating closely to make sure you are not misinterpreting a note or item that may have sentimental, rather than romantic value.

Just because he kept his ex-girlfriend’s picture or his first love’s note doesn’t necessarily mean he is cheating on you. It’s important to get solid evidence of his cheating before you confront him, so look at any notes, gifts, or photographs with a discerning eye.

  • Ask

Asking the dreaded question is one of the most cost-effective ways to get to the bottom of things. Sometimes you have to stop playing guessing games and just come out and ask about the possible cheating. If you’re shy about confronting your cheating partner, you may want to start by asking mutual friends if they know anything. If all else fails, sit down and have a heart to heart with your loved one. Sometimes this is the only way to get a straight and accurate answer.

If you are noticing shifts or changes in his behavior, it is possible he may be treating you this way not because he’s cheating, but because he is dealing with other internal issues like depression, grief, severe anxiety, etc. Talking to him about your suspicions rather than resorting to drastic measures like snooping around or encroaching on his privacy, will show that you care about the relationship and about making it work.

Cheating Partner

  • Changes in They schedule

All of a sudden, your partner may stay out a lot of nights at work or have a lot of get-together on their social calendar with their friends. If your partner doesn’t ever invite you with their friends, or if they claim to be very busy working and still look fresh and happy when they get home, your partner’s probably cheating or up to something no good.

Is your partner claims to be working late, call his or her work number instead of their cell number. If he or she does not answer, you may want to call several times just to give your partner a chance. You may want to check their workplace parking lot to see if their car is really there.

  • Consider hiring a private investigator

Private investigators are licensed to do surveillance and are knowledgeable about the best and most legal tactic to uncover evidence of a cheating partner. According to Martinez Richard Martinez, managing director of Expedite Detective Agency, it is legal to snoop on a man to “protect your emotional and moral well-being” – but illegal to do it for financial gain.

If you are in a long-term relationship where your finances are tied or if you are married, so your finances are legally bound, it’s a good idea to hire a PI. Look for a PI that specializes in infidelity investigations.

  • Monitor Finances

Your finances can tell all your secrets. Keep an eye on any unusual purchases and pay attention to receipts. This is often a telltale sign there might be trouble in paradise.  If you start noticing frequent hotel and late-night dinner charges, you may have your answer.

To verify if there were gifts bought flowers, jewelry, lipsticks, clothes or other stuff through their credit cards which you didn’t get, just check the credit card statements.

Keep a track on their ATM withdrawals for the place and the time it was used. Is the person carrying loads of more cash than usual? Simply verify the transaction records. If possible, try to check how much money they are carrying. A Cheating partner generally carries a lot more cash so that they are not traced through their credit card statements.

  • Check their friend list

They say birds of the same feather flock together and eagles and pigeons don’t hang out together. When your partner suddenly changes into someone different, it might have to do with the kind of friends they are hanging out with. It would be wise to meet them and try to get to know them personally. If they are the party kind, cheating on their partners too, it might help you understand your suspicions.

Who is being seen the most? Who is contacted the most? Are they your friends as well? When you meet them, keep a real alert on for bad feelings when talking to them. Don’t ask direct questions about them. You don’t want to ask them to choose who to support. What people don’t say is at least as useful as what people do say.

  • Use Apps

There are plenty of free and low-cost apps that can help you uncover a partner’s infidelity. Furthermore, if you notice a suspicious app on your significant other’s phone, you should take notice. Although not specifically advertised as a cheating tool, one app that could be used this way is Vaulty Stocks. It looks like a stock app but it’s really used to hide secret pictures and videos. If you see this app on your honey’s phone, you should definitely be wondering what he or she has to hide.

Now that there are so many ways to manage your money, there are new ways for your wallet to come back to haunt you. Useful apps like Mint will send you alerts that say things like, “You have spent $500 on restaurants this month.” If your girl sees that while you’re both at the crib eating Papa Johns and watching Duck Dynasty, things might get ugly fast.

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  •  Withdrawal from bedroom intimacies

This always happens to men. Men have low sex strength (even though their desire may be high) than women, which makes them easily weary after an encounter with a woman. Taken note of this, observe carefully your husband’s withering interest in having intimacies with you. If he starts finding it difficult to perform his bedroom task with you, he is likely losing passion in you, which may arise as a result of so many factors- tiredness due to workload, financial challenges, emotional stress or he is cheating on you.

Try to have spontaneous sex with them when they get back home. If your guy gets angry, pushes you away or tries avoiding it at all costs, chances are, he may be exhausted down there. He could always wash himself up before getting home, but getting it up immediately and blowing a huge load, that’s not the easiest thing to do!

  • Change your sleeping habits.

If your partner’s cheating on you, their sleeping habits may change almost overnight. They may stay up longer using the excuse of work, or you may catch them sneaking around the house late at night. Pretend like you’re asleep as soon as you hit the bed, and try to see if your partner’s up to something. Do they get out of bed for long periods of time?

And it’s not just late nights you need to think about. A cheating partner may even wake up really early and get on the phone, especially if they realize you suspect them. So you really need to stay awake mostly at night if you really want to make these tactics work for you. Believe me, it really works.

  • Keep a journal of your spouse’s reported activities.

Write down the times, dates, places, other people involved, excuses given, etc. Your journal will become invaluable as you compare what’s said with phone bills, credit card statements, ATM withdrawals, talk to other people, etc. A cheating partner is likely to change his or her story, or question your memory, so keeping a record of everything is critical.

Make sure you keep your diary in a very hidden place, he/she must not see it. Keep in mind that once he knows you’re suspicious of his behavior, he might work overtime to cover his tracks. If so, you’ll need to be more vigilant and work harder to get evidence of his cheating.

  • Set up the ideal opportunity for him to cheat

Provide an excuse like a hair appointment or a meet up with a friend and then watch from across the street or in your car down the block to see if your partner uses your absence as an opportunity to meet up with someone.

Keep in mind this is also the riskiest option as it involves lying convincingly to your partner and then staking out his movements until he slips up.

Tell your partner that you are leaving for a couple of days and then wait, listen and watch. Place a recording surveillance device in your bedroom or near the phone and then listen. Park in a friend’s car with a hat and sunglasses on and follow his car or wait for someone to come to the house. Your partner will surely fall into one of these traps.

  • Install A Software On his Laptop and Phones

The truth is, there is a way for you to become privy to your partner’s most intimate messages and emails. For his computer, you can install software that will allow you to spy on his messages without him knowing about it. You only need to install the software once on his/her laptop and it will already be your partner in gathering evidence against your husband. Can you just imagine the peace of mind that this software will bring to you? Finally, you will be able to know what your cheating partner has been doing behind your back.

A similar software can also be installed on your partner’s cell phone. With this software installed on his cell phone, you can definitely catch a cheating partner red handed. Can you just imagine the kind of information that will be in your hands if you will be able to read the text messages that your partner has been sending and receiving on his mobile? If he is really seeing someone else, you will most likely have an idea who that person is because of the messages. The answers to the questions that you have been asking for will finally be yours.

  • Changing Passwords and Keeping Secrets

Be wary if your partner’s computer activity becomes sneaky or secret and if he gets defensive or distant if you use his computer or ask to see what he is looking at on his screen. This may be a sign he is trying to limit your access to his computer and hiding something on his hard drive or browser history.

Try to get access to the computer when he is out and check the hard drive for hidden folders with images of other girls or partners, as well as love notes if you really want to know if your partner is cheating.

Your partner has changed most of their passwords, even if you thought you knew all of them. And even when you ask them for the new password, they make an excuse to hide it from you. And sometimes, you may see that they position their computer facing away from you, and they would never do that before.

In conclusion,

To accuse your wife or husband of infidelity, you better be sure of your facts. You need evidence to confront them with and not just a gut feeling. Remember it would be a shame to ruin a relationship because of gut feelings and suspicion.

Never confront your cheating partner until you’re certain that you have enough evidence to make your case. And never reveal all of your evidence at once. Most cheating partners will try to concoct a story to fit the evidence presented. But if you withhold some evidence, and let your spouse create a story, it gives you the opportunity to use the remaining evidence as leverage. And if you strategically withhold evidence, your spouse will start to question exactly how much you know, increasing the odds that he or she will tell you the truth.


David Small

is the founder and editor of relationshiptips4u. He is a dating, marriage & relationship coach, speaker, and author. Learn more about him here and connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

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