Why do some couples stay together for long? Have you ever wondered what their secret is? Well, that is a valid concern, given the number of relationships that break after a short time.
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Gone are the days when patience was a virtue! Today, most people prefer instant pleasure than the creation of a blissful relationship. Selfishness is among the key reasons for disharmony in a relationship. Couples keep fighting, quarreling, and seem to disagree on everything.
So, what can you do to have a blissful relationship? The following are the top 50 amazing secrets of a happy blissful relationship.
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Table of Contents
Appreciation
How often do you show appreciation for your partner? Appreciation is about seeing the good in everything your partner does for you.
Making this a habit can motivate your spouse to improve their behavior. It is a sure way of having a blissful relationship.
Psychologists refer to it as “positive reinforcement”. It is a sure way of propping up your relationship.
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Integrity
Like other areas of life, integrity is important in relationships. When you honor your agreements and stick to your word, then you have integrity, which is an everyday thing.
You should learn to practice integrity every single day without stopping. Otherwise, you will create disharmony by disappointing your partner all the time.
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Master the skills to Build A Stronger Relationship
Humor
One of the hidden secrets for a blissful relationship is to laugh about your own foibles. While relationships are serious affairs, you should not be too serious about them.
Laughing about your weaknesses will diffuse tension and create a sense of bliss. That is what everyone in a relationship wants.
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Respect
Without respect, your relationship will experience everything apart from bliss and happiness.
Respect enables you to interact with your partner in a safe, positive way. It gets rid of the attitude of entitlement, contempt, and selfishness.
These are the views of Michael Webb in his book: “50 Secrets of Blissful Relationships”. He believes that respect is the foundation of a relationship.
Related Article: The Ultimate Guide on Low to Improve Your Love Life.
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Boundaries
Being in a relationship with someone does not mean you deny him or her the right to lead an independent life.
Lay clear boundaries and your partner will feel, think or do what he or she wants. Only that these things should be within the stated limits.
After all, there is no such thing as absolute freedom.
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Empathy
Empathy means understanding where your partner is coming from. When you know your partner’s triggers, you can avoid pulling them.
When you are empathetic, you will step back, give space or pat him or her in the shoulder.
That way, you will show you understand what is going on. Even better, it takes an empathetic spirit to know how to help your partner when he or she is having problems.
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Listening
When people speak, they have a deeper meaning than words. Listening is better than hearing. It is about understanding the message.
Apart from the words, learn to watch for the non-verbal cues. Couples who live in bliss seem to do this all the time.
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Ongoing Courtship
After a few years in a relationship, you are likely to stop trying to please each other. That should not be the case. You should commit to court your partner on an ongoing basis.
That is the only way you are going to have a happy relationship. That is because your partner will reciprocate every effort you make.
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Child-likeness
Who wants to be in a relationship where it is all work and no play? A little playfulness brings out your child-likeness and makes the relationship blissful.
However, that can only work if your partner appreciates you. Otherwise, they are likely to dismiss your child-likeness as inappropriate. That could create tension.
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Reciprocity
Relationships become doomed when one partner is giving too much. Always consider the needs and expectations of your better half.
For example, if she always makes breakfast, why not surprise her one day by doing it yourself. Serve it to her in bed and she will never forget it.
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Sex
One of the less-appreciated secrets of a blissful relationship is great sex. It has the power to bring the two of you together and create a sense of bliss.
Allen Gerald recommends open communication when it comes to sexual needs. His book Secret to Long-Lasting Relationships is exactly what your relationship needs!
Related Article: 103 Free Date Ideas That Will Transform Your Relationship.
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Clear Expectations
What do you expect from your relationship? Make it clear from the get-go! Create an atmosphere of understanding, trust, and compassion.
In the process, you will have a happy successful relationship.
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Honesty
Couples who avoid issues or fail to acknowledge certain truths undermine their relationship.
Is that you? Honest couples face the truth and address issues. Honesty has proven to be important when it comes to having a strong relationship!
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Acknowledge Your Differences
There is no way you and your partner can be the same in thoughts and feelings. So what should you do? Learn to appreciate your differences at the emotional and cognitive level.
Blissful relationships thrive by acknowledging your differences and finding ways to come together.
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Compromise
It is easy to emphasize your individuality when you enter into a relationship. Yet, that may not work as expected.
To compromise, try to understand your partner’s feelings, thoughts, and perspectives. With that, you will know how to conform to them.
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Embrace Change
People change relationships too. The tragedy is when you start to mourn about it. Instead, you should celebrate the change to create a more diverse and strong relationship.
That does not mean that you hold onto a relationship when it is no longer tenable. Knowing when to walk away from a relationship is important in creating bliss.
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Alone Time
Having a blissful relationship does not mean staying together 24/7. By spending time apart, you will be able to clear emotions and think straight.
Examples of negative emotions include anger, frustration, disdain, and so on. Learn to have some “you time” to find ways of getting rid of them.
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Exclusivity
As much as you think that open relationships or polygamy is great, you will not get any bliss out of it.
Having to share a partner can arouse feelings of inadequacy. For that reason, you should stick to one partner. That is what exclusivity in a relationship is all about.
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No Cheating
Most cheaters blame partners for their actions. What they forget is that working to better the relationship removes the drama.
But how can cheating be avoided? The answer to that question is simple: learn to create excitement in your relationship.
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Affection
It is not enough to tell your partner how much you love him or her. Instead, your actions should aim at showing affection the way he or she likes it.
Everlyn Roberts Brooks says as much in his book: Six Secrets for a Harmonic Marriage. According to her, men and women tend to perceive love in different ways. Show affection to your partner, learn what he or she appreciates!
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Minding Each Other
When in a relationship, you are an extension of each other. Since your partner is your extension, you should mind his or her welfare.
If he needs a cup of hot coffee in the morning, prepare it for him. Offer her support by taking out the trash often. When you learn to mind each other, you will have a lot of marital bliss.
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Never Putting Each Other Down
To feel good about themselves, some people have no qualms putting their partners down. Yet, that can only mean the end of a blissful relationship.
The way to go is to stop using harsh words against your partner since this can break even the toughest spirit.
Related Article: 103 Free Date Ideas That Will Transform Your Relationship.
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Keeping Promises
You can only be as good as your word. As such, keeping promises is important for creating a strong relationship.
It is a way of showing your partner that he or she can trust you. When you say you will do something for your partner, ensure you honor your word.
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Spending Time Together
For a blissful relationship, take it upon yourself to spend quality time together.
That can be at home or elsewhere but activities in the home may render that impossible. To avoid interruption from your pets and kids, go to a hotel, restaurant, or park.
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Loyalty
What would you do if you found your partner in a fight with someone else? Which side will you take?
Loyalty means supporting your partner in all situations. Remember to point out anything you think is wrong, do it in private!
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Priority
It will be difficult to have a blissful and happy relationship if you do not make your partner a priority.
The best way is to address each other’s needs and wants. That does not mean neglecting your children and other obligations. Rather, it is about putting your relationship first.
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Less Criticism
Cursing, insults, sarcasm, public humiliation, and contemptuous facial expressions define many relationships. No surprise that most of them end up in divorce.
One of the secrets of a blissful relationship is avoiding all forms of criticism. That way, you will build a harmonious relationship.
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Apologizing
When pride takes over, it is difficult to admit when you are wrong or even apologize for your mistakes. Saying “sorry” shows your partner you respect them.
It means you are ready to compromise and forge ahead. That is definitely one of the secrets of a happy relationship.
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Reminisce Happy Days
It does not help to talk about the bad stuff from the past. That can only mean constant quarrels and disagreements.
You can create harmony in your relationship if you take time to think and talk about happy times from the past.
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Non-Domineering
The easiest way to create tension in a relationship is for one partner to be dominating. There is a difference between being a dictator and an authoritative person.
The difference is that dictators want things to go their way all the time. Authoritative people are not afraid to express themselves.
So, learn to show that you know what you want without imposing yourself on your partner.
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No Manipulation
No one likes to feel like a puppet. If your partner loves you, he or she will do the right thing even before you ask.
In that case, you have no reason to try manipulating your partner. Otherwise, you will only push your partner away from you.
Related Article: 23 Startling Tips that will Save A Dying Relationship.
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Resolution of Issues
Fighting is part of any normal relationship. It is what you do to resolve the issues that matter.
As such, you should not sleep before sorting out your issues. That is one of the best ways to create peace and make your relationship blissful.
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Accept Criticism
It might be difficult for you to prevent your partner from criticizing you. If he or she loves you, they are going to point out your wrong deeds.
Take it Positive! You should seek to understand the issues and handle them!
In her book, “22 Secrets for a Blissful Marital Life”, Sola Osunmakinde recommends accepting and implementing positive criticism to ensure your relationship thrives!
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Mystery
According to conventional wisdom, partners need to disclose everything to each other.
Yet, maintaining a sense of mystery can keep your love alive and strengthen your union. Try it out! Add some mystery in your relationship! You will forever be grateful.
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Dependability
Couples that depend on each other tend to have a happy relationship. You only have each other and should strive to meet each other’s needs.
When you share secrets, you should expect that your partner would never tell. It is about keeping each other’s back.
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Effort
It takes a great effort to have a successful relationship! The effort should be mutual. If you leave it to your partner, there will be an imbalance in the relationship.
Samuel Nangole in his book, Top Secrets to Blissful Relationships says “that it takes two to tango”.
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Principle
Do you have any values and principles? If so, do not compromise for the sake of the relationship. People who do that end up feeling abused, neglected or taken for granted.
This is likely to create disharmony and lack of bliss. Sometimes you have to stand your ground when you know you are right. That way, your partner will learn to appreciate and honor your opinion.
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Stay Attractive
Life will happen! When it does, be ready to make changes and stay attractive. For example, you are going to gain weight and grow older. The worst thing you can do is to leave things to chance.
So, learn to take care of yourself. Neglecting to take care of yourself may mean your partner will no longer find you attractive. Try several things including exercising and proper grooming.
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Ability to Recognize Mood Swings
Emotional intelligence is vital in relationships! To have a great relationship, you have to learn to know when your partner is happy or annoyed.
The ability to recognize your partner’s mood changes can prevent unnecessary conflicts. It can help you know how to react to a statement he or she makes.
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Being Realistic
One of the biggest secrets of a Blissful Relationship is having realistic expectations. To have realistic expectations, you ought to be aware of what your partner is able to do.
Unrealistic demands will only strain the relationship. If anything, couples who expect too much from relationships end up disappointed. Learn not to demand too much from your partner.
- Giving
Most people in relationships today expect to receive a lot but give very little. This results in an imbalanced relationship that puts a strain on one partner. So what can you do?
Well, you can try simple gestures, such as making breakfast for your partner or opening the door for them. As simple as it is, this can create bliss where none existed.
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The Small Things
Some people would rather say “thank you” and “please” to a boss at work than to a partner at home. That is because they are afraid of losing their jobs for being disrespectful.
Do you know that using these words in a conversation with your partner shows you respect them? Apart from bringing the two of you closer, it creates a sense of mutual respect. No relationship can thrive without that.
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Exercising Together
Did you know that exercising together could lead to a more fulfilling relationship? According to research, physical arousal has the same effect as romantic and sexual arousal.
For that reason, couples who work out together tend to feel more in love and sexy. Besides, sweat contains natural pheromones, which will draw the two of you together. If you have not been doing it, start exercising together with your partner today.
Related Article: How to Improve Communication Skills in A Relationship.
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Vacation
Living in the same environment year-in-year-out breeds boredom. Boredom can mean the end of a blissful relationship. Occasionally, take a vacation as a couple or travel together with other couples.
This is the message in “Reviving the Flame of Love” a book by Fitzgerald Green and Muhammed Gadjiev. He suggests taking a vacation to re-energize and create a sense of enthusiasm in your relationship.
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Eating Together
As obvious as it sounds, quite many couples rarely eat together. At the dinner table, you can reconnect with your partner and the rest of the family.
The key is to relax, laugh, and have meaningful conversations. That is the perfect recipe for all blissful relationships!
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Switching Roles
Relationships can become overwhelming! One of the easiest ways to be weighed down by the demands of a relationship is to keep doing the same thing every day. So, why not switch roles, for once?
On a random day, let the woman be the one to drive or the man be the one to prepare a meal. The women could also start the sex talk, for once. Switching roles creates a sense of variety and draws the two of you closer together.
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Give and Take
A relationship is not a competition. Yet, too many people do everything to win arguments. One of the secrets to blissful relationships is to let your partner also win sometimes.
If you insist on winning, you will come off as being unloving and disrespectful. Moreover, that can only mean a less blissful relationship.
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Agree to Disagree
When they fall into an argument, some couples fail to reach an agreement. Thus, they risk escalating the conflict even further. Taking the easy route is not always right.
Did you know it is possible to have a blissful relationship with disengaging and moving on? If anything, the dwelling on past issues can spell doom for the relationship.
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Forthrightness
Some couples have relationship conflicts because they are not forthright about their needs. Unless you are a prophet, there is no way you can know what your partner needs before they say it; the same applies to him or her!
So, learn to be forthright about your needs. That way, you will remove the guesswork from the efforts the two of you take.
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Seeking Help
There is nothing like a perfect relationship. All relationships go through difficulties. There is a difference between conflict-ridden and a blissful relationship. The difference is that partners in the latter seek help.
One of the biggest secrets of a blissful relationship is seeking the advice of a trusted friend, counselor or religious figure when an issue is too big for the two of you. In his book: “Nurturing Healthy Relationships” Olarotimi Olagunju urges couples to speak out!
As you can see, there are actually no secrets for a blissful relationship. Rather it is all hard work. Go for it!
