17 Warning Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

By David Small •  Updated: 02/06/18 •  12 min read

Do you know the Signs Your Spouse is Cheating? Do you suspect that your spouse is seeing someone else behind your back? Cheating on you?

There are certain sure giveaways that you should always look out for.

Even if you do not suspect infidelity, any of the following behaviors and mannerisms should be treated as a cause for alarm. Chances are that you’ve ignored these because after all, love is blind.

 Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

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Do not be blinded anymore, open your eyes and see the writing on the wall. You are lucky if your partner has not yet slept with another person. Even if they have, confront these warning signs and put an end to the betrayal once and for all.

In this article 17 Warning Signs, Your Spouse is Cheating we are going to share with you the signs of a cheating spouse.

In her book,Surviving Infidelity: Why Do People Cheat?” Sarah Crawford states that there is life after a painful breakup.

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Sign 1. Unexpected Change of Routine

As C.L Grant writes in the book“Is He Cheating On You? Signs of a Cheating Man and How to Catch Him”, there is a reason for concern if your partner makes sudden changes in routines.

If he or she starts working late at night or too early in the morning, chances are that your partner is warming up to the advances of another person.

This warning sign is even clearer when your spouse cannot explain the sudden switch. If you are not part of that change, smell the coffee because there could be a third party in your marriage.

As three is a crowd, act fast to flush out the other person before you are replaced. New passwords on devices, strange purchases, and exclusive credit cards are such changes.

Sign 2. Unexplained Change in Communication

What happened to the daily phone calls that you once received while the two of you were dating?

Anthony DeLorenzo,  the author of“Warning Signs: How to Know if Your Partner Is Cheating-and What to Do About It and writes that your spouse is seeing someone else behind your back.

He or she has probably found another person who has caused the drop in attention to you.

On the contrary, increased communication could be your partner’s effort to conceal an extra-marital affair. If he or she sounds more cheery and excited for no reason when you meet at home in the evening, find out what has caused the change.

On asking, your partner will just turn down the whole conversation.  Anthony goes ahead to tell you what to do about the infidelity.

Warning Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

Sign 3. Your Spouse Change of Appearance 

Sudden changes in the physical appearance of your partner could be a warning sign of danger. Susan Silverford, the author “Signs Of Cheatingobserves that cheaters will dress to impress.

Has he or she dropped your wedding ring or is it on the wrong finger? This is a glowing warning sign.

There are fewer reasons why a husband could suddenly being too attentive to his facial looks other than his overtures to a lady he has met at work. If you see her dress in clothes that she did not fancy in the past, there could be a big problem.

Further, a person who just dresses up nicely even when not going anywhere hopes to find attraction. Do not applaud them for their change of hairstyle, dressing codes, cologne, and general body looks. Instead, investigate and act.

Sign 4. Change in Sexual Appetite of  Your  Spouse 

A reduced desire for sex is a sure warning sign that your wife or husband is getting it from someone else. This is especially true if your own sexual drive is high and there are no fights between the two of you.

The opposite of this is also true, as Kinzie Ross writes in “Signs of Cheating (How A Devoted Wife Dealt With A Cheater Book 1)”.

An unexplained increase in libido could be triggered by a person’s attempt to conceal infidelity. Biologically, unfaithful causes a spur to sex for both genders.

Find out if this warning sign is true before your partner ruins your marriage or worse still, infects you with a deadly STI.

Sign 5. There are Hidden Clues

The smallest clues of infidelity could be the biggest warning signs of an errant spouse. If he or she starts spending money on things that he or she did not, take caution.

In her book titled Is He Cheating On Me? The Easy Step-By-Step Guide To Discover If He Is Being Unfaithful, Matt Price advises you to heed the smallest signs.

Restaurant receipts in his or her pockets, lipstick smudges on his shirt and that strange smell in his breath are all tell-tale signs. Matt further describes different types of cheaters and the reasons why they do so.

As you learn how to catch your other half in the act, understand how to survive the unfaithful relationship or marriage.


Sign 6. Other People Drop Hints

Kristin Koch, a contributing author at Woman’s Day notes that your friends’ language could point out warning signs of an unfaithful partner.

If they start spending more time with other people than he used to before, maybe they have been infatuated with someone in that circle of friends.

Moreover, pay attention to what other people say about your partner. This includes his work colleagues, business partners, close family relations, and friends. They will give hints of where your partner has been and who he was spotted with.

Sign 7. Your Intuition Tells You So

Do you just feel that something is not right? Ashley Rosebloom says that you could be right. Women are especially good with the sixth sense. Some do not need to see obvious warning signs. That look in his eye when you are intimate or when you are having a conversation says it all.

In her book,Infidelity Signs: How to Catch a Cheating Spouse in Infidelity Having an Emotional or Sexual Affair, Ashley asks women especially to heed that silent non-verbal cue in their husbands’ body language, facial expressions, and mannerisms.

Sign 8. STD in Marriage

This is perhaps the most unfortunate and most embarrassing sign yet that your other half is having sex outside marriage.

When you are diagnosed with an STI yet you are 100 percent sure that you are faithful is not just a sign, but evidence of infidelity.

In the book titled “Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs”, Ruth Houston not only describes HIV and STIs in a marriage but also warns you in advance.

Read her book today if you suspect infidelity and get yourself covered before contracting life-threatening diseases. Apart from STIs, Ruth talks about 828 other signs as well as approaches to confronting reality and moving on with life.

Warning Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

Sign 9. Increased Self Esteem

People often cheat to prove themselves right, an action which leads to an increase in self-confidence. A cheating spouse becomes bold in appearance, language, and communication because his or her ego has been massaged.

This is especially true if the person was not getting the needed attention.

Gary Neuman, the author of The Truth about Cheating: Why Men Stray and What You Can Do to Prevent It does a groundbreaking study on unfaithful men. He writes that a spike in his self-esteem is a sign that he is having an affair.

Gary talks at length with his clients and describes this warning sign in detail.

Sign 10. Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

This is a direct opposite of the above sign. It happens when a couple has cheated and feels guilty about it. This is especially true if the affair was not discreet and other people around his life know it.

The cheater feels insecure that his or her partner will get wind of the affair and confront him, or worse still, file for divorce.

In an exclusive interview with relationship expert Tracey Cox, Daily Mail’s contributing writer Martha Cliff advise you to be attentive at his loss of self-esteem especially if you have ruled out causes such as loss of jobs, sickness, and death of a close friend.

Sign 11. Decreased Interest in You

Picture this: You and your spouse engage in a hobby such as swimming, play tennis or visiting your local children’s charity home. She suddenly or gradually loses interest with no apparent reason.

In place of these favorite pastimes, she chooses to meet her girlfriends or spend time jogging ‘alone’.

Gregory Smith, in his book titled “Signs of Infidelity – How to Know for Sure if your Partner is Cheating” believes that she is cheating either sexually or emotionally.

This book helps you know beyond a reasonable doubt if she is seeing another man.


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Sign 12. Criticism Towards You Increases

One of the biggest reasons for infidelity in marriages is the loss of interest in your better half. Remember the good old saying -Familiarity breeds contempt.

One partner starts seeing the negative attributes of the other and treats them with contempt, disrespect, unwarranted criticism and ridicule.

A husband, for example, starts criticizing his wife’s weight gain and snoring at night. Alba Alvarez says that an unfaithful partner becomes resentful and stops acknowledging the other person’s once positive attributes and attractive demeanor.

Sign 13. Your Better Half is Defensive about Infidelity

Affaircare is a Christian blog on matters of marriage, relationship, and courtship. In one of the widely read blog posts titled All of the Signs Your Spouse May be Cheating, the blog emphatically agrees that a defensive partner is a cheater.

There are perhaps no cheaters who admit their infidelity. However, if they are too defensive they are perhaps depending on the old defense of ‘deny, deny, deny. If they come up with the same old line that ‘he is just a friend’, chances are he is far more than a friend.

Sign 14. Unexplained Increase of Attention to You

Is your loved one spending unusually too much time close to you? You could revel in this new-found affection for you. However, he or she could be hiding some sort of unfaithfulness. They want to be close to you to see if you know about the affair.

In her ground-breaking book on wayward spouses, Jennifer Mathews helps you seek clarity. Her book “Is He Cheating?: Discover How to Identify Signs of Cheating educates you on how to differentiate true affection from pretense and cover-up love.

Relationships Tips for You | Tips For Better relationships

Sign 15. Changes in Financial Expenditure

Is your telephone bill suddenly shooting through the roof, thanks to your husband’s endless conversations? Jim Stephens, author of How to Catch a Cheating Lover: A Guide to See the Signs of a Cheater, believes that your other half is cheating on you.

Other warning signs of a deceitful spouse are the opening of a private bank account and covert expenditures. The unexplained exchange of gifts between your partner and a close friend should not be treated kindly, especially if that ‘friend’ is of the opposite sex.

Sign 16. Abandonment of Religious Faith

Once a religiously committed person starts seeing other lovers, he or she will be guilty of their sins. They may start giving excuses to skip church or abandon their religious commitments altogether.

As Lee Smith notes in his book “Beware Of The Signs: A Family’s Journey through Infidelity, a family’s commitment to religion can go down South, thanks to an unfaithful partner.

If there are children in your marriage, their religious life could also be affected because of the absence of one of their parents from worship and faith-based activity.

Your partner’s guilt could be evident in increased drunkenness and even suicidal tendencies.

Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

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Sign 17. Unwarranted Accusations of Adultery

Have you been accused of infidelity when you are 100 percent sure of your devotion and faithfulness to your partner? E. J. Howard thinks that your spouse could be seeing other people.

In the book titled CHEATING 101: 101 Warning Signs & Red Flags, Howard writes that cheaters often accuse their better halves of infidelity.

Here is a book that will help you read the mind of your loved one all the time and tell when there is cause for alarm. When they accuse you, find out what to do in your quest for the truth.

The manuscripts of this book are so on point that the author was severally asked not to print it.


Note that the above warning signs could be due to other things unrelated to infidelity. If they are present in your relationship, treat each as a sign and not proof or the gospel truth. Afterward, look for, the evidence and stop your partner right in their tracks.

Most of the above books discuss the signs your spouse is cheating, and tell you what to do to clear your suspicion. More importantly, know how to deal with the heartbreak that follows the confirmation of cheating.

With these insightful resources, you no longer have a reason to sweep evident warning signs under the carpet.


David Small

is the founder and editor of relationshiptips4u. He is a dating, marriage & relationship coach, speaker, and author. Learn more about him here and connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

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