15 Ways to Become a Woman Worth Pursuing

By David Small •  Updated: 03/07/17 •  11 min read

Becoming a woman worth pursuing is something every lady secretly craves for. Of course, you want to be with someone who values your worth, understands your personality, and know exactly how to treat you right. While these qualities are only mere dreams for many ladies, you’re about to know the reason why – and how to position yourself to be that lady every guy would find worth pursuing.



Truth is, living a valuable life here on earth demands you exhibit some personal principles. These principles at best determines the kind of people you attract. First, it shows your true character, and then it tells people – without saying – so much about how far they can go with you. This works like a mathematical constant; you act a certain way, you attract a certain kind of people.

Don’t know how to go about it? These 15 ways should position you to become a woman worth pursuing:

  1. Know Yourself

This is like the golden rule of life – know yourself. I say that because, if you understand you, it will be difficult to be swayed around like a little girl. You will know exactly what you want, what you don’t want, and how to deal with what you don’t want.

To be a woman worth pursuing, you cannot afford to be swept off your feet by every dick and harry that comes promising love to you. You first look into yourself if that matches the kind of person you want to be with; someone that complements you. If not, you know exactly what to do.

Understanding yourself goes a long way to shaping your relationships; from the people, you move with to those you eventually decide to share part of your life with. I love how Matshona Dhliwayo puts it, “If you don’t know your worth, people will put a cheap price tag on you.” 

  1. Don’t Be Too Easy to Get

If you want to become a woman worth pursuing, you don’t want to be that woman that is ready to go at every instant. You won’t have to wait around for the next available man or allow someone into your life that easily; you want to keep the wall while you examine his character to see if he’s a good fit for you.

You won’t make him a priority the minute he comes into your life. You only open up when you’re sure about him. You don’t become too emotional and give in before you’re sure. Doing that may mean you’re cheap and you take decisions based on your emotions, which is a place you don’t want to be.

Men love the chase. They see you as the prize. As cliché as this may sound, it is true that if you make it too easy for them to reach the prize, the value reduces.

  1. Be a Low Maintenance Woman

A woman worth pursuing will not throw her imaginary bills at a potential partner. If you have a high taste and fashion sense, show that by getting most of your things yourself and not depend on him to get it for you all the time. Yes, designer stuff is nice to wear but show that you can get it yourself and let him know. You don’t want to be seen as a greedy gold digger, do you?

Men do not want to feel used. Anything that gives him a sense of that, drives him away. Trust me, if he still stays, then he is using you emotionally. The only exception to this rule would be to be an independent woman and allow him to buy what he feels you need without asking him for it all the time.

  1. Occasionally Give Him an Intellectual Challenge

Yes. Behind that pretty face of yours, men love to know what else you’ve got. If you’re the type that always agrees with him about everything, he’d think you’re some doormat. You don’t want to be that. A woman who is worth pursuing understanding certain things to know what is wrong and what is right. The confidence in that knowledge makes you challenge him intellectually once a while.

Oh, if you know how sexy it feels to be a knowledgeable woman! Ever heard of beauty with brains? That’s right. You can be very beautiful, but if you lack that intellectual power, a man won’t find you that worthy of pursuing. The solution? Read books. Get knowledgeable about what you think he likes, like football, golf, cars, etc.

“I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn’t be a staring contest.” – Frank Sinatra

  1. Be Supportive of His dreams

Emotional support is one of the greatest things men yearns for. They desire a woman who not only understands their path but can also encourage them along that path. They want that support, that pet talk, that encouragement. It shows that you want to be in their life for the long run, and you care enough to help make them a better person.

This support makes them feel they need you more than you need them. And when you become that much of an asset to a man, he will go through the ends of the earth to be with you. He will make sure he doesn’t lose you because, of course, you are pivotal to his success. You will become a woman worth pursuing.

  1. Have a Good Sense of Humor

Whether you think he’s funny or not, laugh around him at the slightest opportunity. This makes him feel important, yes, by massaging his ego. Besides, it also reduces the pressure of communication between you both. It also shows you know how to have fun and that you don’t take life too seriously.

When you appeal to a man in this area, he wants to not just keep you around, but also want to have you for himself. The pursuit won’t be a drag.

  1. Let Go of the Bitchy Attitude

You see, a large part of who we really are comes from how we respond to the things that happen to us every day. What would you do when someone indirectly insults you? How would you respond? Give him/her a piece of your mind or teach them a subtle lesson about maturity?

People are difficult to work with. They will annoy you, piss you off, and make you want to snap at them the wrong way. But maturity demands you respond in a civil way as opposed to reacting to what they said. A woman worth pursuing understands when to snap and when to keep her cool.

  1. Be Strong

What makes a strong woman? You guess it right. A woman who has been through a lot and still standing tall. A woman whose decisions are not a direct response to what she’s been through. A woman who doesn’t give in or give up in life so easily.

Men love strong women. They believe a strong woman is one who can keep the home together, especially when things go awry. They don’t want one who is always crying at every instance something goes wrong. They want one who is proactive enough to reason with them in ways that can get them out of an unfortunate situation. A woman they can actually plan and take decisions with. This is the type of woman worth pursuing.

  1. Be a Woman Who Listens

We are in a world of gender equality; where most women feel they don’t have to listen to men or obey every word they say. They feel and act the path of men’s responsibilities and try to make that clear when they are with a man. Of course, I believe God created us equal, but do not forget the reason He created the woman – to be a helpmeet to the man. (Genesis 2:18).

Men do not pursue any woman who is not ready to listen to them. By listening, I do not mean obeying every instruction; I mean being submissive enough to make him feel like the man that he is when taking certain decisions. Your listening means you are ready to be a help meet, fulfilling the purpose of your creation.


  1. Be a Woman That Loves God

If God is love and love is God, then men believe that a woman who loves God is a woman worth pursuing. Yes, you cannot really love a man if you do not understand what true love for God is. You see, love is beyond the romance the media portrays on TV; love is giving your all – in faith – to someone you never knew.

If you could give your all to the God you’ve never met, then you can truly love a man. Men see you as an asset when you love God. It gives them the confidence that they can build a life with you without fear. They see you as the ‘Proverbs 31’ woman – a virtuous woman (Proverbs 31:10-31). They’d want to keep you close and never let you go.

  1. Be Empathetic

Empathy is gradually becoming a rare quality these days. Humans are growing colder by the day. Of course, we already have a lot to deal with personally. But how about showing others that you really care about them? Sharing their feelings – their happiness and sadness together? The bible teaches in the eight beatitudes of Jesus, that blessed are those who show mercy, kindness, empathy, for they shall obtain mercy – Matthew 5:7 (emphasis mine).

Men love women that can share their feelings. One who can be there for them in hard times and good times. One who can show they truly care about them. They find such women absolutely irresistible.

  1. Be Sensual

Believe it or not, men find women who are in tune with their bodies absolutely charming and worth pursuing. Sensuality is not the same thing as giving yourself away. It shows you own your body and proud of it. It is both an attractive quality to a man and also shows how confident you are in yourself. Need I say men love confident women, again? You bet!

In his book, Divine Union, Nityananda Das said it best, “Beauty is to recognize how full of Love you are. Sensuality is to let some of that Love shine through your body.”

  1. Do Not be the Nagging Type

It doesn’t matter how you nag. Nagging is a total turn off for men. If you want to show how untrustworthy and disrespectful you are, then nag. But if you want to be otherwise, then don’t. It doesn’t mean you should always keep quiet about things that bother you. You can sit him down and discuss it over in a matured way. But nagging? Don’t!

  1. Show Appreciation All the Time

How does it feel when you gift someone an expensive stuff and all you get is, “wow, I love this”? Well, it’s one thing to show someone you really liked what they got for you, it’s another thing to tell them ‘thank you’. Appreciation is not just to show how grateful you are for the gift, but it is also a seed for more.

When you appreciate the giver, it encourages him/her to gift you more gifts. Men love grateful women and find them worth pursuing.

  1. Be Prayerful

Trust me, you have no idea how more sexy it feels to see a beautiful and prayerful woman. That is a killer combo! Being a praying woman tells a man that you are worth keeping as a wife. Men want one that doesn’t just complain about whatever the family faces, but one who takes matters to God in prayer – one who intercedes for the family.

You see, women are the pillar of the home. They keep or break the home. A prayerful woman is one that is worth pursuing and keeping.


Becoming a woman worth pursuing is not hard work. You just have to first understand yourself, be yourself, and every other thing will fall in place. I would like to end this article with this powerful quote from an anonymous source,“A beautiful woman uses her lips for truth, her voice for kindness, her ears for compassion, her hands for charity, and her heart for love. For those who do not like her, she uses prayer.”

David Small

is the founder and editor of relationshiptips4u. He is a dating, marriage & relationship coach, speaker, and author. Learn more about him here and connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

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