For most individuals, the bedroom is where all the action happens. It is the default place to have sex given its comfortable, soft, and cozy nature. Resisting the satin bed sheets and pillowcases is close to impossible. No wonder many people never think of having sex outside the bedroom.
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Once you have made love to your partner, all that remains is to sleep in all day long. When you give it a careful thought, it is not a must that you make love in bed. You can have it on the couch, desk, coffee table, balcony, the beach, shower, kitchen, car, and in a tent. Talk about virtually anywhere you feel safe.
It really matters where you have sex. The following are 12 shocking benefits of having sex outside the bedroom:
Discover Your Exciting Side
Always having sex in the bedroom can be monotonous. It takes the excitement out of the whole process, since it is impossible to try new positions. You just have no room to experiment. When you have sex outside the bedroom, you will be reminded that you are part of nature.
Say you are out camping. In the heat of the midday sun, you decide to make love. In they book The Naked Truth about Sex Dave and Ashley Willis, “this makes you connect with your wild, primitive side. That feeling of having grass, sand, and dirt on your bare skin is primitive, earthy, and simply hot. It doesn’t have to be anything planned”. Sex outside the bedroom could take the form of a Friday afternoon quickie on the beach, parking lot or coffee table. Nothing can beat the thrill you will feel.
Rediscover Your Younger Years
Most of the time, sex in the bedroom has you boxed into a routine of formality that takes the fun out of the whole experience. Not so for the out-of-the bedroom experience which takes you back to your innocent and playful nature. Remember that electric first touch? That’s how a change of location often feels. It comes with skyrocketing hormones, mind-blowing orgasms, the fireworks.
So if you want to be reminded of the time when you were carefree, get outside the bedroom often. Diana Richardson says as much in her book, The Heart of Tantric Sex. The rush of electricity from head to toe. It’s just unbelievable. Even if you were careful in your teenage years, you will bring back all the memories of passionate sex. It will take you to when the two of you first met. Make it a priority to venture out of the bedroom once in a while.
Great Sex Memories
Is there anything much you can say about all the years you have been having sex in the bedroom. The routine, monotony, and boredom is nothing to talk about. Great stories are created by thrilling, out-of-the-box experiences. That’s what making love outside the bedroom is all about.
Say, you are out on vacation in your favorite beach location. There are other people around but you manage to find somewhere to hide. Quickly, on the warm sand, you make love. While at it, you keep looking around in the fear that you might be found in the act.
As Clifford and Joyce Penner say in The Gift of Sex, that’s what great sex memories and stories are all about. When you return home, you can remind each other of how the experience was. When you meet with your friends, you can also share with them these thrilling stories. The more you tell these stories, the more exciting your life becomes.
Make Great Discoveries
There is a lot that goes through your mind when you have sex in a public or open space. You just can’t help but be scared of being caught. The rush of adrenaline in your body when you hear footsteps is just incomparable. You are so scared of being caught that you are almost helpless. The excitement just made it worth the while.
Most people who have sex outside the bedroom enjoy the fear of being caught. David Schnarch says as much in his book, Passionate Marriage. It could be in the campground, car, or the beach. In all these places, you are likely to get caught by the people around. Your nerves pickle as your skin tingles. If you did not know how exciting sex can be, you will rediscover it. You get to learn totally new things about yourself.
Add Sparks In Your Sex Life
There are times when you will find sex outside the bedroom to be so boring. Instead of adding excitement to the whole experience, the bed has a completely opposite effect. It tranquilizes your sex life and makes it feel very boring. To remind yourself of the sex champion you are, it is important to venture outside the bedroom once in a while. Stephen Snyder author of Love worth Making, says, “the funkier the experience, the better”.
Try it on an airplane, shower, car, sofa, dining table, kitchen table, and so on. There is no better way to spice up your sex life. While at it, be careful that you are not caught. When you finally go back to the bedroom, you will have every reason to keep the fire burning.
Communicating On a Completely New Level
The bedroom can get so familiar that you will no longer feel excited when making love. The best way to create excitement is to take deliberate steps to make out in a variety of new places. Whether it is a campsite, parking lot, car, the beach, and so on, the passion and desire you had for each other will be rekindled to a great degree.
As a couple, you get an opportunity to communicate at a completely new level. Every time you return from a new, fresh location, you are going to talk about it with your partner. These are the views of Dave and Ashley Willis in The Naked Marriage. Your conversation will center on how you think it went and whether you plan to do it again. If not, where else do you plan to go? The thing about sex outside the bedroom is that it is more steaming if it is spontaneous. Why not?
Making Your Holiday Experience Better
You are out on holiday in a very new place. The hotel room is comfy but you don’t feel like staying here you a whole day. You hire a boat and head out to the sea. This is an opportunity to make love to each other outside the confines of the bed in the hotel room. If your vacation was beginning to boring, you can add fire to it by making out on the boat. It could be a rubber dingy, private yacht or ferry.
If you are not sailing, the beach will suffice. Alternatively, you could be out camping, and the grass next to the campfire is the best idea of a thrilling place. Whatever the situation, making up outside the bedroom can add fun to your vacation. Thus says Rochelle Foxx, in Sex and Marriage. It is a sure way for you to overcome jet lag and the cultural shock you get for being in a completely new location.
Having More Sex
One thing about having sex in the bedroom is that it becomes boring and monotonous. This leads to you having very little of it. When it comes to sex outside the bedroom, it can add variety to your love making. This is proven by a study by House Method, which established that people who made love outside the bedroom had more of it.
On average, those who stuck to the bedroom had sex only 5.8 days a month. Those who changed locations had it 10.9 days a month. So it seems that venturing outside the bedroom doubles the number of days couples have sex in a month. That speaks volumes, especially to those who have been fighting over how many times they have sex, yet they stick to the bedroom. To have more sex, all they need is to do it outside the bedroom.
More Satisfaction with the Relationship
It is no secret that couples who have more sex are closer and more satisfied with the relationship. Lack of sex creates tension, anger, and strains even the closest relationship. But it is not enough to have sex. How frequent you do it also matters. The more the sex you have in a relationship, the more you are likely to be satisfied.
Also, where you have the sex really matters. In the study by House Method, it was established that couples who have sex outside the bedroom are more satisfied with the relationship. In the study, couples who stick to the bedroom had a 62.2 percent satisfaction with their sex life. The same group reported an 84.4 percent satisfaction with their relationships. Couples that made love in multiple places were 86.6 percent satisfied with their sex life. The same couples were 93.8 percent satisfied in their relationships.
It takes a life of vicissitudes before you can truly trust each other. When you stick to the bedroom, it is easier for your partner to say no to your sexual advances. The environment is so familiar and the processes boring and monotonous. When your partner persists in telling you off every time you want to make love, it can breed suspicions about whether he or she truly loves you. You may even start assuming that your partner is cheating on you.
Given that it is easier to make love outside the bedroom, you will have no doubt that your partner really loves you. The risks you take while at it, and the stories you share when you return all help in building trust. If anything, you are more satisfied with your sex life and the relationship as a whole. So if the trust levels in your relationship have been going down, remedy the situation by having more sex outside the bedroom. After all, Kevin Leman says as much in Sex Begins in the Kitchen.
Giving You a Reason to Text Your Partner
In today’s highly connected world, people are relying more on text messages to communicate. Every day, you keep looking forward to a text from your partner. He or she also expects you to send a couple of texts. Regular texting is known to improve relationships. As Bruce Bryans says, Text’s So Good He Can’t Ignore It. But you cannot text your partner if you have nothing to talk about. One way to create a subject to talk about is to make love outside the home on a regular basis.
It could be anything from how exciting the experience was to the fear you had about being caught. Since this is a private experience between the two of you, holding a private conversation via text message will make it very exciting. The day after you come back from the beach holiday is the best time to exchange multiple messages about your experience. That will definitely draw the two of you closer than you have ever been before.
Improving Your Health
The good thing about having sex outside the bedroom is that it enables you to have more of it. When you make love more, you boost your immune system. As MD Wheat et al say in Intended for Pleasure, sex is also good for your health. Apart from fighting diseases, your body will be able to resist others. You can fight off viruses, germs, and other pathogens. Besides, it improves bladder control in women and helps to lower blood pressure. Sex is also considered a great way to sweat off those extra calories. When making love, you burn 5 calories per minute. This helps to keep your heart in good health.
It has also been established that having more sex helps lessen pain and the likelihood of getting prostate cancer. Besides, you get to sleep better and experience less stress. Lack of sleep and stress can lead to poor health. To prevent such diseases, you need to have a lot of sex outside the bedroom.
Clearly, there is every reason for you to have sex outside the bedroom. Instead of having to put up with the boredom of the bedroom, you should get out of the box, literally. Places such as the car, shower, parking lot, kitchen, and couch are all great when it comes to adding variety. You and your partner will experience greater sexual and relationship satisfaction.
Additionally, you will get a lot to talk about in face-to-face conversations and text messages. The good thing is that making love outside the bedroom doesn’t require much effort. With some spontaneity, you are good to go.
is the founder and editor of relationshiptips4u. He is a dating, marriage & relationship coach, speaker, and author.
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